Episode 110: Planning Ahead for Long-Term Care

In this episode of Informed Aging, Robin Rountree talks with Lauren Mendelsohn of New York Life about what long-term care insurance is, why Medicare isn’t enough, and how planning early can protect income, independence, and legacy. They discuss the real costs of care, hybrid policy options, and why planning matters.

You can reach Lauren by her cell phone: 407-701-4835 or her email: lgmendelsohn@ft.newyorklife.com. 

Check out her podcast, Our Strength Within, a podcast for people living with chronic and invisible illnesses. 

Support the Alzheimer's & Dementia Resource Center 

Transcript

[00:00:05] Robin Rountree: Welcome to Informed Aging, a podcast about health, help and hard decisions for older adults. I'm Robin Rountree I'm a former family caregiver. I've worked in the home care industry and now work for the Alzheimer's and Dementia Resource Center. The thoughts and opinions expressed here belong to me and my guest, not our wonderful employers and
[00:00:25] sponsors 
[00:00:26] Before making any significant changes in your life or your person's life, please consult your own experts. 
[00:00:34] Today we're gonna be talking about something you may not know that you need long-term care insurance. We're gonna be talking to Lauren Mendelson of New York Life. She also hosts her own podcast.
[00:00:47] Our Strength Within. We're gonna learn a lot, so stay tuned.
[00:01:02] 
[00:01:25] Speaker 2: For over 40 years, the Alzheimer's and Dementia Resource Center, A DRC has stood beside Central Florida Care partners to those living with dementia. At A DRC, our mission is simple, yet vital to empower care partners through compassionate support, education, and resources. At A DRC, we believe no one should walk this journey alone.
[00:01:46] And every person impacted by dementia deserves dignity, compassion, and respect. Learn more@arccares.org.
[00:01:54] Robin Rountree: We are back talking with Lauren Mendelsohn, with New York Life. And you specialize in long-term care. 
[00:02:01] Lauren Mendelsohn: Yes, I specialize with long-term care planning. 
[00:02:04] Robin Rountree: So a lot of people, when I have mentioned the phrase long-term care insurance, they're like, what? What is that? Give us a very basic description of what long-term care insurance is.
[00:02:17] Lauren Mendelsohn: Long-term care insurance is a way to strategize, to cover the cost of long-term care in the future. So unable to do two outta the six daily living activities. It costs money. 
[00:02:30] Robin Rountree: Mm. So 
[00:02:31] Lauren Mendelsohn: how do we plan for that? 
[00:02:32] Robin Rountree: Okay. So a lot of people think, Medicare will pay for that. Mm-hmm. True. Or 
[00:02:38] Lauren Mendelsohn: to some extent. 
[00:02:39] Robin Rountree: To some extent.
[00:02:40] Like a hundred days in skilled nursing, right? 
[00:02:42] Lauren Mendelsohn: Yeah. Less and, 
[00:02:43] Robin Rountree: yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So if you're looking at. I can't function at home the way I used to. I need a little help. Um, one way would be to bring in like our sponsors, senior helpers, they can come in and help, but it's not cheap. 
[00:03:01] Lauren Mendelsohn: No, it's the cost of living in Orlando right now is $176 a day 
[00:03:08] Robin Rountree: for 
[00:03:09] Lauren Mendelsohn: the average 
[00:03:09] Robin Rountree: term for someone to come 
[00:03:10] Lauren Mendelsohn: long term care.
[00:03:11] Robin Rountree: Okay. $106 a day in a facility. 
[00:03:15] Lauren Mendelsohn: Just the general. General, they said like if it's high end. Right? Right. Like I'm spending $400 a day or 
[00:03:20] Robin Rountree: Right. 
[00:03:21] Lauren Mendelsohn: Spending $50 for my family to come take care of me. 
[00:03:23] Robin Rountree: Yeah. 
[00:03:24] Lauren Mendelsohn: So that's just the average in Orlando. 
[00:03:25] Robin Rountree: That's a lot. 
[00:03:26] Lauren Mendelsohn: Yeah. 
[00:03:27] So I ask people all the time, could you afford to put six to 10 grand away a month for the next three to five years?
[00:03:35] Robin Rountree: Yeah. Yeah. That's you're going, oh, that wouldn't be me, but no, like the nice facilities here, like the one with the, you know the pizza oven? 
[00:03:45] Lauren Mendelsohn: Yeah. 
[00:03:45] Robin Rountree: And that's gonna be And the 
[00:03:47] Lauren Mendelsohn: pool and the 
[00:03:47] Robin Rountree: everything. The pool. Yeah. You want all the amenities, right? Yeah. You don't want the motel six, you know, you want the high end.
[00:03:54] You want the Ritz Carlton, you're looking eight, $9,000 a month. 
[00:03:59] Lauren Mendelsohn: It's nuts. It's like people complain about rent. Yeah. And then I'm like, multiply it by five. 
[00:04:06] Robin Rountree: Right? 
[00:04:06] Lauren Mendelsohn: That's what it is. And I think people don't see the urgency and need to plan for long-term care until a parent needs assistance. 
[00:04:16] Robin Rountree: Right.
[00:04:17] So I've heard middle age is the time to start looking at long-term care insurance, but you could shop for it when you're 18, right? 
[00:04:25] Lauren Mendelsohn: You technically could at 25 and older. 
[00:04:29] Robin Rountree: Okay. 
[00:04:30] Lauren Mendelsohn: What I tell people is the need for life insurance goes up and it goes down. The need for long-term care is low and then goes up.
[00:04:40] So there's a difference between want and needing life insurance. Mm-hmm. Like, hey, I need it for X, Y, and Z in the future, it's more of a want, and then long-term care is more of the need. I tell people all the time, you're working so hard to enjoy retirement. Do you want 50 to a hundred percent of that going towards care?
[00:05:01] Robin Rountree: Mm. 
[00:05:01] Lauren Mendelsohn: Does it affect the legacy you leave? That's like the biggest question I ask, but I try to turn it into a positive thing because I tell people, if you plan now in the future, your kids won't have to do what you're doing. I've seen both sets of grandparents, the ones who have long-term care 
[00:05:21] Robin Rountree: mm-hmm.
[00:05:21] Lauren Mendelsohn: Insurance, and the ones who don't. It's a completely different picture. 
[00:05:25] Robin Rountree: Right. 
[00:05:26] Lauren Mendelsohn: So, yeah. 
[00:05:27] Robin Rountree: So like a comparison would be, I think a lot of people wouldn't have automobile insurance, but it, it's regulated, right? You have to have it to drive your vehicle. Mm-hmm. Allegedly, some people still don't do it, but you think, I'm never gonna use this 'cause I'm a safe driver.
[00:05:43] And I think a lot of people think, well, I'm not gonna ever need care. But that's not what the statistics bear out. 
[00:05:50] Lauren Mendelsohn: Yeah. Three out of four women. Are in a facility later in life. What I tell people is there's the three most important things to people. 
[00:05:58] Robin Rountree: Okay. 
[00:05:59] Lauren Mendelsohn: Family, health, and income. 
[00:06:02] Robin Rountree: Okay. 
[00:06:02] Lauren Mendelsohn: Ensuring those three are not required.
[00:06:05] The next three are home, auto, and home assets. Those three are required to be insured. 
[00:06:12] Robin Rountree: Oh, wow. So our top three are not 
[00:06:15] Lauren Mendelsohn: No. But do people, 
[00:06:17] Robin Rountree: right. 
[00:06:17] Lauren Mendelsohn: They usually do when they see the value. 
[00:06:19] Robin Rountree: Okay. So you were talking about, you said something about life insurance. The need goes up and then it goes down.
[00:06:25] Explain that to me. 
[00:06:26] Lauren Mendelsohn: So when you're young you have little to no obligations, then you move out, you buy a home, you get a car. You may have student loans and stuff like that. So your obligations of financial need go up, right? You have one or two children, maybe five, I don't know, 
[00:06:44] Robin Rountree: right? 
[00:06:45] Lauren Mendelsohn: And then. They graduate eventually, at some point become financially independent, unless they're never financially independent, and then you're in your fifties and the kids are, are transitioning into their own lives.
[00:07:00] You're paying off your mortgage. You have hopefully paid off the student loans by then. And so the shift of perspective goes towards. Hey, I may need care in the future. the need for life insurance decreases, but the need for long-term care increases because your perspective and goals have shifted into something new.
[00:07:24] In your thirties, you usually don't have 80-year-old parents, 
[00:07:29] Robin Rountree: right? 
[00:07:29] Lauren Mendelsohn: But in your fifties, you may have 70, 80, 90-year-old parents and they need help. 
[00:07:37] So you're, that help or the insurance company can be that help, 
[00:07:42] Robin Rountree: because you know, you're thinking, okay, mom and dad are great, but one bad fall can put you going quickly downhill.
[00:07:51] Lauren Mendelsohn: Yeah. 
[00:07:52] Robin Rountree: And can you just take time off every day? 
[00:07:55] Lauren Mendelsohn: Can you, 
[00:07:56] Robin Rountree: can you, 
[00:07:56] Lauren Mendelsohn: I know I work with New York Life and there is a way to, compensate the people who are taking care of you. 
[00:08:04] Robin Rountree: Wow. Yes. 
[00:08:05] Lauren Mendelsohn: Um, but I'll tell you, I have someone who I love very dearly who never had health issues over two years ago, and now she needs help.
[00:08:15] And it's impacted our entire family, but at least she did the planning in her forties, which is a tad young, but never too young. 
[00:08:23] To make sure that she's planned for now. Um, I think people don't see the value unless something happens. 
[00:08:32] Robin Rountree: And on a, uh, episode not too long ago with child Free trust.com, I believe, I can't think of his name right now, but he was saying.
[00:08:41] The best indicator of your financial success in life depends so much on if your parents have planned adequately. 
[00:08:50] Lauren Mendelsohn: Yeah. 
[00:08:51] Robin Rountree: Because if they haven't, it's coming out of your pocket Quite possibly. Yeah. 
[00:08:56] Lauren Mendelsohn: Well, like I always ask people, like, if you're in your fifties and taking care of your parents, what happens when your kids are taking care of you?
[00:09:04] What does that financial picture look like? Because you could have accumulated so many asses for your retirement. But you start spending them. 
[00:09:12] Right. If you retire from at 65 or 70 to 80, 85. So you're spending your retirement assets and then can you afford to put 250 or more away for care?
[00:09:26] It's not supposed to be a depressing conversation. Right, 
[00:09:29] Robin Rountree: right. 
[00:09:29] Lauren Mendelsohn: But it brings people down to reality and says. Hey, this is the opportunity that we can prevent something from like that happening, 
[00:09:38] Robin Rountree: so someone is thinking, well, I have this life insurance policy because I wanna leave something behind to my kids.
[00:09:46] Lauren Mendelsohn: Yeah, 
[00:09:47] Robin Rountree: you gotta wanna flip the switch on that and say you don't wanna spend your kids' money right now. 
[00:09:53] Lauren Mendelsohn: It just depends the situation. Sometimes you can take your life insurance and reposition it to long-term care planning. Oh. So 
[00:10:01] Robin Rountree: you can help with that? 
[00:10:02] Lauren Mendelsohn: Yeah. I just open the door to discussing strategies and I tell people all the time I'm working with someone now who I introduced this idea to four years ago.
[00:10:13] Robin Rountree: Mm. 
[00:10:14] Lauren Mendelsohn: So I tell people the urgencies on your end, not mine. 
[00:10:17] My parents have planned for long-term care. So they see the value. They've protected us. So your financial future and the way you'll impact your kids, I'm just trying to alleviate some of the pressure that could happen in the future. it's already hard enough to see your parent, who usually takes care of you having to take care of them. 
[00:10:41] Robin Rountree: Yeah. 
[00:10:42] Lauren Mendelsohn: And financial pressure doesn't help. 
[00:10:44] Robin Rountree: No. Uh, we certainly know here at A DRC the emotional impact, um, and that financial picture, you know, they're having to go, well, where should I place mom if she has to go into memory care?
[00:11:00] It's like, well. What can you afford? 
[00:11:02] Lauren Mendelsohn: I think it's really important for professionals like myself to be in contact and understand what your organization does because you help so much. I asked you when we met last week, why wouldn't someone work with you? 
[00:11:17] You're like, that's the question I ask myself every day.
[00:11:21] Robin Rountree: Right? Right. 
[00:11:21] Lauren Mendelsohn: It's the same thing with me. 
[00:11:23] Robin Rountree: Yeah. 
[00:11:24] Lauren Mendelsohn: New York Life compensates me. 
[00:11:26] Not the client. So if you do this with or without me, it doesn't matter. So I tell people they work with me 'cause of me. 
[00:11:34] Right. And so. When I met you, or my dad actually connected us and he was like, you gotta meet her.
[00:11:42] And so I just thought it was great and right as soon as you left, I sent my friend a, a picture of your flyer and everything, right. He said, send me the information and send me her information. I didn't realize that's what he needed. 
[00:11:59] Robin Rountree: Yeah. 
[00:11:59] Lauren Mendelsohn: Until you walked in my door. 
[00:12:00] Robin Rountree: Right. 
[00:12:01] Lauren Mendelsohn: Because I feel like it's hard to help someone if you don't know.
[00:12:06] And so if I have relationships with people like you, it just alleviates other emotional pressure on the people that I'm helping. 
[00:12:13] Robin Rountree: And this is why I bring up the long-term care insurance, having taken care of my mother. And she had that, made such a difference in the level of care I was able to provide.
[00:12:26] Like I could have someone else in memory care with her, making sure things were happening, but also reading, when she got stressed, she would have somebody immediately be able to take her out of the situation instead of leaving her there. I mean, it's not a life or death issue, but because my mother bought long-term care insurance, I was able to provide that.
[00:12:46] Lauren Mendelsohn: Like it's The standard of living. 
[00:12:49] Robin Rountree: Yeah. 
[00:12:50] Lauren Mendelsohn: Right. Like, and let me ask you, and if it's too personal, we 
[00:12:53] can, 
[00:12:53] Robin Rountree: that's okay. 
[00:12:54] Lauren Mendelsohn: When did you get long-term care? Was it after you saw the effects that it had on your mother? Yes. 
[00:12:59] Robin Rountree: Yes. 
[00:12:59] Lauren Mendelsohn: So it's like someone can bring up the conversation.
[00:13:03] Robin Rountree: Right. 
[00:13:03] Lauren Mendelsohn: But if you don't see the value, it doesn't work. 
[00:13:06] Robin Rountree: Yeah. 
[00:13:06] Lauren Mendelsohn: And so what I tell people all the time, it's like you have to work with someone when they see the value. Yeah. And. 
[00:13:15] I who, I lost my grandfather when I was a senior in high school and he didn't recognize me the last time I saw him. 
[00:13:21] Robin Rountree: Yeah. 
[00:13:22] Lauren Mendelsohn: But he wasn't living in a situation that I would want my future kids to live in.
[00:13:27] Robin Rountree: Gotcha. 
[00:13:28] Lauren Mendelsohn: Because he didn't plan. 
[00:13:29] And so the thing is, what's different is women live longer. 
[00:13:33] Robin Rountree: Yeah. 
[00:13:35] Lauren Mendelsohn: My grandparents have a significant age gap where now it's a conversation, but people just don't know what's out there. 
[00:13:43] And I know it may seem a little funny, but it's like you don't know what you don't know.
[00:13:49] Robin Rountree: It's a hundred percent true. 
[00:13:51] Lauren Mendelsohn: Yeah. 
[00:13:51] Robin Rountree: Yeah. Just educating people that Medicare is not going to pay for years in an assisted living facility right now. No. 
[00:14:00] Lauren Mendelsohn: People think like, oh, if Medicare doesn't, I'll get Medicaid. 
[00:14:04] And it's like, do you wanna be in that position? Or people think long-term care is health insurance.
[00:14:09] Robin Rountree: Right. 
[00:14:09] Lauren Mendelsohn: And it's separate.
[00:14:10] And it's like understanding the benefits you have, but it's like, why is health insurance so expensive? It doesn't help that. 
[00:14:17] Robin Rountree: Right? 
[00:14:17] Lauren Mendelsohn: I'm like, well, you just have to figure, find a advisor who can help you and find an advisor who knows people like you can also. I don't know. Like a Swiss Army knife.
[00:14:29] You have all the different tools in your back pocket to be able to help. 
[00:14:33] Robin Rountree: So what about the person who says, well, what if I never need it? What if I'm that one in a million person who has her 100th birthday party and then gets hit by a bus? 
[00:14:44] Lauren Mendelsohn: Well, I say to them, I say, do you have health insurance? Do you have auto insurance? Sometimes people don't believe in insurance, so they're like, I don't have health insurance and I have auto insurance.
[00:14:55] 'cause they make me, well, I say to them. Maybe you don't see the need, but if you. Pass before you need it. There's ways to leave your investment to the next generation. 
[00:15:10] Robin Rountree: Yeah, because this is something relatively new. It's like a hybrid policy, right? Yeah. What are those about? 
[00:15:16] Lauren Mendelsohn: So the hybrid is more funding at lump sum wise.
[00:15:19] So putting money in now. 
[00:15:21] And then there's not ongoing payments. 
[00:15:23] And then you have. The long-term care benefit, the next option is, Hey, I wanna quit. I wanna move to the south of France. I want my money back. 
[00:15:32] Robin Rountree: Oh, 
[00:15:33] Lauren Mendelsohn: there's that option. And then there's a death benefit, like a life insurance. So when people say, Hey, I have a hundred grand to put away.
[00:15:41] Robin Rountree: Mm-hmm. 
[00:15:41] Lauren Mendelsohn: But I wanna leave it to my kids if I don't use it. There's a death benefit, like a life insurance there. 
[00:15:48] Robin Rountree: That's nice. So you're getting that security, but there's still a benefit if you don't use it. 
[00:15:54] Lauren Mendelsohn: Yeah. I ask people like, do you pay for health insurance? 
[00:15:57] Robin Rountree: Mm-hmm. 
[00:15:58] Lauren Mendelsohn: And some people say, most people say yes.
[00:16:01] And I say Why 
[00:16:03] Robin Rountree: in case something goes wrong. 
[00:16:04] Lauren Mendelsohn: Yeah. 
[00:16:04] Robin Rountree: Yeah. 
[00:16:05] Lauren Mendelsohn: That's the whole thing of insurance. If you think about anything, it's making sure if something happens, your family will be okay. 
[00:16:12] And you're taking care of who doesn't wanna live at the long-term care Ritz? 
[00:16:16] Robin Rountree: Right. 
[00:16:16] Lauren Mendelsohn: I 
[00:16:16] Robin Rountree: mean, I, I want the Ritz-Carlton level.
[00:16:18] Yeah. I really do. 
[00:16:18] Lauren Mendelsohn: Someone told me that the other day. So yeah. 
[00:16:22] Robin Rountree: I have toured a lot of places and I have one picked out. I'm, yes. 
[00:16:25] Lauren Mendelsohn: Well, it's important for someone like you to be in these facilities. I know, like Senior helpers and other organizations 
[00:16:32] Are going in. And creating support groups for the families.
[00:16:36] Robin Rountree: Yeah. 
[00:16:36] Lauren Mendelsohn: So I think it's really important for someone who is taking care of someone who is forgetting who they are.
[00:16:42] Or the present. That they have a resource like you. 
[00:16:45] Robin Rountree: Yes. Because they may forget faces and names, but they still deserve to be treated with dignity. 
[00:16:52] Lauren Mendelsohn: Yeah. 
[00:16:52] Robin Rountree: And to be able to work with what they've got left.
[00:16:54] So 
[00:16:55] Lauren Mendelsohn: I'm gonna, I'm gonna share something with you from, a friend of mine, there's something that their senior assisted living facility put out that's like a hundred things to do with a loved one who's who needs care. 
[00:17:08] It's 
[00:17:09] like fold a t-shirt or whatever, just to give them a purpose. 
[00:17:12] Robin Rountree: Because purpose is so important. If you don't have a reason to get up outta bed. Yeah. And you know, I don't know what it's like to have dementia. Mm-hmm. But I would be very confused if I didn't have something to do. 
[00:17:24] Lauren Mendelsohn: Yeah. You know, it leaves structure, like if someone's a, a stay at home mom.
[00:17:29] Right. She had certain things to do in her life. Right. Let's just say it was folding clothes. That's the only thing I think about. Yeah. Because then I'm like, someone told me this is that. Okay. If it was folding clothes, that's her routine. 
[00:17:41] If there's a man or a woman who always went to work, well, what was the first thing?
[00:17:46] Let's just say they made coffee. 
[00:17:47] Right. Like staying in a routine. 'cause sometimes like I've learned with dementia, Alzheimer's, like sometimes it's present memories, sometimes it's the past memories and stuff like that. 
[00:17:58] Robin Rountree: Yeah. 
[00:17:58] Lauren Mendelsohn: So. Just giving someone a why to get out of bed, I think is really important.
[00:18:03] And being with people. 
[00:18:04] I go back to the facilities to go play rummy with all the ladies. 
[00:18:08] Robin Rountree: Aw, 
[00:18:09] Lauren Mendelsohn: it's fun. But it keeps their brain sharp.
[00:18:11] And it's the social aspect, and 
[00:18:13] Robin Rountree: it's really 
[00:18:14] Lauren Mendelsohn: important, 
[00:18:14] Robin Rountree: and this is the stuff we want our families to focus on, is engaging with their person instead of
[00:18:21] working a second job or third job to afford their care. Yeah. So that's why I have you on trying to tell people how important it's to have long-term care insurance.
[00:18:31] . Um, and you're probably, if you haven't heard of long-term care insurance, this conversation, this quick podcast may be a little confusing.
[00:18:38] Mm-hmm. But that's when you go and talk to someone like Lauren who can take longer to explain it for your specific situation. 
[00:18:48] Lauren Mendelsohn: Yeah. You asked me what it is. It was very brief, right? And 50,000 foot overview. 
[00:18:52] Robin Rountree: Right. 
[00:18:52] Lauren Mendelsohn: It's just a way to plan for your financial future. And I know people will have more questions 'cause it's so broad.
[00:18:59] But I tell people if you believe in insurance, this is something you should educate yourself on. 
[00:19:05] Robin Rountree: That's fair. 
[00:19:06] Lauren Mendelsohn: That's fair. And, and you can pay for long-term care from your bank account. 
[00:19:10] Robin Rountree: Oh, 
[00:19:11] Lauren Mendelsohn: it's just do you want to, like, do you wanna put six to 10 grand away a month? 
[00:19:16] Robin Rountree: Right? If the answer 
[00:19:16] Lauren Mendelsohn: is yes. Okay. 
[00:19:18] Okay. 
[00:19:19] Robin Rountree: If somebody would like to talk to you. Lauren, what is your contact information? 
[00:19:23] Lauren Mendelsohn: My cell phone number is (407) 701-4835. 
[00:19:28] Robin Rountree: Alright, we'll have that in the show notes along with your email and
[00:19:33] please just consider long-term care insurance as one of the many insurances that we pay for. And it's not, not to throw this in at the end, but it's not like $2,000 a month. 
[00:19:44] Lauren Mendelsohn: No, it could be as little as like your phone bill or water bill. 
[00:19:47] That's what I tell people. So I appreciate it, Robin, for inviting me to share.
[00:19:52] I'm here to educate anyone no matter the stage of your life. It's just really important to me. So thank you. 
[00:19:59] Robin Rountree: Thank you for being here. 
[00:20:00] Please make sure to subscribe to our podcast Informed Aging and Tell your family and friends about us. You can find us at facebook.com/informed Aging. Today's episode was recorded at ARC's Podcast Studio. That's it for now. We are looking forward to our next visit.